Ten habits of parents that cause harm to their children with their behavior

 Having a father's or mother's card does not imply being possessors of the universal truth; We can also make mistakes as human beings. The important thing is to be able to detect the negative habits that cause harm to our sons and daughters.

Ten habits of parents that cause harm to their children with their behavior

As human beings, adults also make mistakes. And this is no exception in parenting. Often with the best intentions, in other cases due to ignorance or lack of knowledge of the harm that our actions can cause to children, we make decisions or have behaviors that are inappropriate, which damage the self-esteem of our sons and daughters.

They are habits of all kinds, but they all have a common denominator: they are negative; They entail serious consequences for the little ones because they harm them emotionally and/or physically. The damage that we adults generate in our children can leave wounds whose pain lasts even once healed.

Obviously, not all negative habits that parents commit that harm their children have the same consequences. They are not all equally serious, but they are actions or behaviors that should be corrected, hence they can all be put in the same bag, that of the things to be corrected.

It is important to remember again that we can fail, and that no one is perfect. But it is also essential to be able to recognize these errors, to be aware that just because we are fathers or mothers, we are not already possessors of the universal truth and do everything well.

Don't worry if you see yourself reflected or recognize yourself in any of these negative habits. All of them, even the most serious ones, can be corrected.

Ten habits of parents that harm their children

Below, we compiled ten of the most common negative habits of fathers and mothers that harm their sons and daughters.

Delegitimize: It is common that when communicating with our sons and daughters we do not legitimize their opinions, thoughts, and desires. All experts in positive parenting insist that it is the first basic mistake since it is essential to open a respectful and effective channel of communication with them to legitimize what they transmit to us.

Annulling: in addition to not legitimizing, there are fathers and mothers who directly annul their sons and daughters. As? For example, denying them the opportunity to express themselves, or rejecting them from wanting to do this sport or study a certain option that does not fit with what their parents have in mind for them.

Ignore them: in any everyday conversation, prefer to listen to another person who is with you at that moment, or go on your cell phone. Or simply change the subject without answering your son or daughter's call for attention. This is very common in some parents and is very damaging to the little ones. And consequently, the communication and the bond with them.

Lack of emotional support: Not providing emotional support to children when they need it can make them feel neglected and insecure. It hurts them. And sometimes we adults do it because we don't give enough importance to what our sons and daughters do.

Attacking: verbally, of course, is a way of harming our sons and daughters. This often occurs through impulsive behaviors that involve yelling and negative comments. And, of course, we also include in this habit of physical aggression, the slap (or worse) “of a lifetime.” The fact that it is lifelong does not mean that this gesture is not an attack.

Overdemand: how many adolescents or young people, burned by the demands they have experienced since childhood in their family environment, recognize that they prefer a change of scenery, throw in the towel, or suffer mental health problems derived from this overdemand. Many. Also, remember that the path is more important than the final result.

Comparisons: Comparing is inevitable, whether with brothers and sisters or with school friends of the same age. But comparing is a harmful habit because it unbalances us. Above or below. There is rarely anything positive about comparing our children, and yet we can greatly damage their self-esteem, so let's try to avoid it.

Favoritism: it is a typical family habit that is related to the previous one. There is still favoritism between children, grandchildren, and nephews. And if you have a preference for one, it doesn't cost that much to wear it inside and not show it. You will avoid hurting the other little ones.

Excessive or inappropriate punishments: always have reparative consequences, because the lack of limits is another harmful habit, but decontextualized and inadequate punishments always have a consequence on the self-esteem of boys and girls. And it is a negative consequence.

Overprotection: in the same way that punishment and poorly understood hierarchy are very negative habits that harm children, so is overprotection, because we do not let them be themselves. It may seem that we are preventing them from suffering, but in the medium and long term, this overprotection can lead to very negative consequences for the little ones.