Ten daily habits that can help you improve your relationship with your children

 The emotional and family bond with children and adolescents is something that can be worked on daily, day by day, through habits like these.

Strengthening the family bond between parents and children is not something that can be achieved overnight. Neither in childhood nor during adolescence. Although it is best to do it from a young age, it requires time, attention, and perseverance in any case. In short, improving the relationship with your children and strengthening ties with them involves taking care of small everyday details, working day by day to achieve this through some habits that are not difficult to assimilate and apply.

Since the key lies in the daily aspects, the difficulty is not so much paying attention to what they are, since many of them are certain in your head as the mother or father that you are, but in managing to maintain them in the long term. Watering your relationship with your sons and daughters every day involves being consistent in the habits that we know are effective in strengthening the bond with them.

Even so, although they are well known to most parents of children and adolescents, below we review some of these daily habits that can help you improve your relationship with your children. Better to redound to it than to leave something behind.

Ten habits

Surely, you have some more in mind that we have not included in this list of habits. We have decided to limit the list to ten because they are the ones that, in our experience as parents, and based on what child psychology professionals say, have the most positive impact on the relationship with the children.

Quality time: 

Those of us who educate parents about parenting get tired of repeating the expression “ quality time ”, but it is worth doing because it is, without a doubt, one of the most effective ways to strengthen the bond with our children. Pay full attention to them for part of the day, whenever you can.

Family meals: 

This is a habit that, due to family custom or lack of time, is not followed in many Spanish homes. It is still common to see children eat or have dinner earlier, even having breakfast alone while the adults do other things first thing in the morning. However, enjoying family meals, ideally without television, is one of the most effective ways to share quality time together and, consequently, to strengthen family ties.

Giving them a voice in family matters:

We not only mean that we dedicate quality time to our children, but it is also important to make them feel that their voice matters within the family structure. Obviously, not in transcendental matters if they are five years old, but in matters in which they can participate, such as the family agenda.

The nighttime ritual: 

In addition to the quality time in the afternoon, or in the mornings if it's the weekend, it is highly recommended when we have small children to participate in the nighttime ritual that you have created as a family. Accompany them during the bath, have dinner with them, read a story, review, and share the best and worst of the day...

Emotional support: 

The emotional part is the most complicated to attend to and enhance as parents. It is difficult for us, as adults, to put ourselves in the shoes of our little ones; understand that we are not born with the lesson learned on an emotional level, and that what for us is a grain of sand on a beach can be a mountain for the little ones, or for our teenage son or daughter, it is an exercise that can bring enormous benefits to the relationship with our children. Accompanying them emotionally is key.

Active listening: 

Leaving a permanent door open to communication with our children from when they are small is the best way to improve the bond with them in later stages when adolescence approaches or arrives, a vital moment in which opening this door can be very complicated. To do this, it is not only about giving advice and talking, but it is very important to know how to listen to the little ones. If you do, they will see that they have many things to say.

Recognize their achievements: 

We tend to criticize, correct, or demand from our sons and daughters from the time they are little at the first opportunity. However, we have a hard time doing the same in a positive sense when they do something worth highlighting and recognizing. And it doesn't necessarily have to be a material achievement; It may be, for example, that you have managed to calm down in the face of an emotional imbalance or a tantrum in a more constructive and positive way than you have done to date. Details like this require a great effort in childhood, so it is advisable to acknowledge it to children. Your relationship will undoubtedly be strengthened.

Lead by example: 

Leading by example is the habit that can be present in every list of parenting advice that is written. Also if the objective is to improve your bond with your children. Because, if it is, there is nothing better than showing how important it is to you that it be so.

Enhance their autonomy: 

Being hyper-protective parents, with “care” and “you can't” on their lips all day, can mean that our little ones are always by our side, but it will not be because the bond is stronger, but because we have generated a dependency in our figure that can be counterproductive for its development and for the family relationship. Therefore, it is advisable to find a balance between affection, protection, and enhancing their autonomy. They like to see that their parents trust them and encourage them to try things on their own.

Physical affection: 

Don't hold back a hug if he needs it or a kiss if he asks for it. In fact, often, especially when they are little, the gesture of affection is what will help your son or daughter get out of an unpleasant situation such as a tantrum or a hot flash with crying. It is much more effective than yelling, about where is it going to end, and on top of that, you will be watering your relationship with him or her.